Look for these 5 Strong Signs An Avoidant Ex Regrets The Break-Up. All you can do is express how you feel, and see if they’re ready to try and change for the relationship. Emotionally Unavailable Men Relationship experts like to call that “commitment issues”. If your partner uses an avoidant attachment style to relate to you, you may recognize these behavioral patterns. He feels sad for you; he thinks he’s made the right choice in dumping you, but he still feels terrible about the whole thing. My Fearful-Avoidant Attachment style is to bail the instant I see a microscopic flaw. She said she had been feeling increasingly sad and hopeless for 1-2 months in anticipation of the breakup. Answer (1 of 15): Love requires you to be emotionally vulnerable and open your heart to another person. What your avoidant partner can do: Recognize when you withdraw and recognize why you withdraw. Do it. It may take for them to get hurt by someone who doesn't value them as … 1. Because of this, fearful-avoidant people have a mixed reaction to breakups: Initially, they do attempt to not feel their feelings and instead numb them in other ways, pretending they’re absolutely fine. Advertisement. 2. Miss Me? Does He Regret What He Browse our listings to find jobs in Germany for expats, including jobs for English speakers or those in your native language. He checks on you more than usual. It is only natural to feel empty after a breakup since a relationship takes up a lot of your effort, time and mind space. First, it is non-confrontational. This whole avoidant thing is a deep-rooted issue that even WHEN someone is self aware - they find it incredibly hard to change. Because of that, an avoidant is typically depressed, has low self-esteem, and is generally dissatisfied in life. About a month prior to admission, she began seeing a new psychotherapist who told her she had "borderline traits" … I was with her for 11 years – then we split for a while, I met someone else who was wonderful and I swore that I would never go back (This is before I understood what a narcissistic was or that I was being so damaged). He feels more secure with one other person and the underlying compulsion to find a source for sex and companionship compels him to try to find a monogamous LTR — over and over and over, with a breakup on average just a few months after committing. How Fearful Avoidant Attachment Develops in Childhood. Fearful avoidant. Nate’s operating mode is serial monogamy. Protective of their personal vulnerabilities. The only people YOU should EVER have a relationship with are other dismissive avoidants because you WILL end up … You may actually be that ‘game changer’; the ex a fearful avoidant can’t let go! To a lot of guys, especially those that are fearful-avoidant, relationships are daunting.